So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
