I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Randomize
