i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
