Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
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There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
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He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
My breasts were aching with rage.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.