it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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