i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
