just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
