the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
this will be a night to untag.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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