I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
