tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
