can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
