Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize