I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
