hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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