what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
The beer is more important than you right now.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
