Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
