Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
