I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
