Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Randomize