if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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