white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
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Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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