I just pynch a tree in the face
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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