So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
