Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
