Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
