Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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