I only kidnapped one of them. chill
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize
