I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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