my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize