So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
