I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
