I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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