Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
