Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
We left the knife in your bed.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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