I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
