Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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