singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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