haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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