exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
