you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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