like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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