Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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