Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
