I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize