We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
