Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
