Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
