that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.