i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
