i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
