Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out

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(416): View more from Ontario

She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(707): View more from California

frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.

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(904): View more from Florida

Champagne is a vitamin, right?

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(269): View more from Michigan

He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.

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(253): View more from Washington

Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.

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