Im at strip club and am horny
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I got inside last night via doggy door
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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